Respecting Thyself
Today, someone asked me in Twitter why and how people put on facades. I told her that of late it has been through face masks, but otherwise it is through posing, enacting, hiding behind personalities, and playing for the gallery!
Most of us are brought up in the social setup, where we put up masks for the society, acting nice for the society while we feel something else inside us. Even in a house of 3, we talk loudly on the phone such that the other 2 in the house hear what we speak as though we want them to learn our position in that matter, in the way of teaching them our morals. In a gathering of say 10 people, we cautiously watch who are all present and play the game accordingly to that situation. I don’t have any complaints about all these, because that’s how the society is, but my problem with this is — we lose our real selves in the process and forget who we are and what we stand for.
What is Respect?
We have seen in social media about ‘Reputation Management’. Why should reputation be managed? The explanation given is that you don’t want any negative comments on you in the social media. To me, that makes sense to some extent, because as a brand, you don’t want messages tarnishing your images floating around, especially when they are all false accusations!
Respect and Image
But, the premise in which people yearn for respect is the image. What we are looking for is the frivolous mental satisfaction that the people would accord on us. It is not in disrespect to the corporate world, but a person who is a Director, wants to be a Vice President, and a Vice President wants to be Senior Vice President, not because they want to experience and enjoy the responsibilities that come with it, but mostly because of the social pressure that people should not ask them, “What? Are you still a Director?” And they slog for the next five years for the title upgrade. Not that I am saying it is wrong, but is it sane?
Respect and Character
A more important thing is ‘Character’. If you nurture and hone your character and build who you are, and take responsibility for the consequences of how you have built yourself, there will not be much need to manage reputation. But, building character is not an easy thing. You need to have seen various perspectives on several issues, and most importantly, you should know what to do in a particular situation for a specific issue. It is a continuous process.
Respect among others then builds automatically if your character is built well. You don’t need to demand it from people, or going around posing your attributes to people. Even if you did, that won’t work in the long run, because people have their own issues to take care of, and so they will lose interest after a while.
Attributes of Respect
So, what should I respect and get respected for?
Our breath, our real lifetime companion till our death, is going in and out without any demand for respect, 24 hours a day! All our internal organs are working perfectly without complaining for a healthy human-being. Our mind, unless it is messed up with our afflictions and falsely-found priorities, is sound, and makes sound decisions when required, for our survival and well-being. These, to me, are the real attributes of respecting myself, and the basis and the foundation of my well-being. Only when I am well, I can see what difference and impact I can make in this world.
A wonderful way of taking care of these are Exercise, Yoga, Breath practices, and Meditation. Especially in the Covid-hit world, it has become necessary for us to be immune as well as strong, and so these daily routines would go a long way in our well-being, of our body and our mind.
So, do you want to respect yourself or your image?
